Pamela J. Kowal, M. S.

I’m acutely aware these days of the process of deconstruction that is essential for true growth. It’s so easy for me to hide behind a role – therapist, friend, partner, daughter. But when those roles are gone by choice or otherwise, how do I then allow my True Self to emerge?

Embracing chaos in life: this allows me to let go of the ego and personality structures that are in place that give me a false sense of security and stability. By allowing a process of deconstruction, I am making more space for the Divine to enter my heart, my body, my soul.

By embracing the gift of deconstruction, I open myself to what is true today at my core. I open to what wants to come into my life. Without my ego telling me what I ’should’ be or do or want, I am allowing a higher knowing to take residence in my being. From that space, a greater good surely unfolds.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” – Howard Thurman

What makes me come alive? Seeing people overcome their challenges… doing the hard work required spiritually, emotionally, and physically to let their Lights shine. My life is joyful and “Lively” because I’ve had the privilege of watching beautiful, courageous people expose their vulnerabilities and learn to not only overcome, but to fly.

Over a year ago, I was having coffee with my brother in his Australian home, ocean waves calling to us. He posed a question and made a comment that stuck with me: “Why don’t you work here a couple months out of the year? It may be the best thing you can do for yourself and your clients, and the world is bigger than your four office walls.”

That conversational seed germinated to what it has become today. Why not be with my loved ones in various locations, as long as I can stay connected to the clients I’m also ‘traveling’ alongside? Mobility and flexibility: aren’t those traits part of a foundation of human resilience? Global access: isn’t that part of the wonder and privilege of being alive in this amazing time?

It’s time for me to honor the next seeds of growth and see what blooms.  I’m off on sabbatical for four months that will take me to Australia and other destinations to be determined. My intention is to explore new ways of practicing that align with my philosophies, spend time in creative and spiritual pursuits, enjoy family and friends, see more of the world, and to ultimately incorporate more of my passions into the services I offer you. In other words, to come Alive in new ways.

A part of me is nervous … I’m temporarily giving up a beautiful office, saying good-bye to a building and concept I helped create and maintain, and opening myself to the unknown.  Another part of me is joyful and excited beyond measure… I know that when one person takes a risk, it only sparks the next one to do the same. Afterall, each of you have taken a risk with me to become vulnerable and grow in new ways. It’s only fair that I return the favor.

And so I ask you, What makes you come Alive?

“Who we ourselves become, how we grow and change and face the challenges of our own lives, is intimately and causally connected to how the world will change over the next few years.” – Marianne Williamson, The Gift of Change

I’m rereading Williamson’s book right now; it seems appropriate for the time we’re in. These are stressful times, and those of us – all of us – who are compassionate, energetic beings, pick up on the collective angst. I believe the best thing I can do to help others is to make sure I’m helping myself first and foremost. If I’m not aware of the depths of my own emotion and doing the work of sitting with it and identifying what I most need, how can I possibly be of service to others? Isn’t this exactly what I am hoping to teach others and support them to do?

I am learning that in spite of intense transition, it’s not an option to take care of my body, my mind, my spirit. It is essential. I intend to maintain my daily discipline of meditation, journaling, walking, eating soulful food. I won’t do it perfectly everyday, but I value myself, my loved ones, and my clients enough to do it consistently enough that they are getting the best Pam I can be. For today.